Lucas reviews his cousin Greg

greg is a 23 year-old medical student and huge asshole currently residing in cambridge, massachusetts with his "girlfriend" Michelle (probably made up). he goes to "harvard university" (probably made up) and loves to talk about it all the time even if you dont give a shit which no one does. no one, greg. greg is generally celebrated among the family due to his "high academic achievements," "volunteer work," "athleticism" and "sense of humor" (greg has never made me laugh). the family loves to hear about his volunteer work with sick poor children in afghanistan, but then as soon as i start talking about my reviews, all of a sudden everyone is bored and i've ruined thanksgiving. when I was 8 and greg was 10 i tied him to a tree and left him there for several days. most of my friends agreed it was a pretty good gag, but greg hated it. you gotta be able to laugh at yourself, greg. zero stars for greg. go feed a sick kid you monster.